


Of Coffeeshops and Soulmates

by WeakKneas



Series: Fragile Love [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, Gen, Gender-Neutral Pronouns for Lafayette, Hamilton and Jefferson kind of get along, Honestly because we need more Jeffmads fanfics, I have this whole thing planned out, JeffMads is the main ship, M/M, Nonbinary Marquis de Lafayette, Road Trips, Slow Burn, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Trans James Madison, lams is mentioned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-11
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-11-30 18:05:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11468841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeakKneas/pseuds/WeakKneas
Summary: Madison has dreamed of meeting his soulmate his failed middle school ballroom (read: it was a school get together at in the gym room) reveal, when lifted up his sleeve and read aloud 'Thomas Jefferson' and was meet back with empty stares. Now struggling through college Madison has to balance his overwhelming studies with his thinning hope of finding his other half.Thomas Jefferson has lead the privileged life any person could hope for. Growing up in the upstate of New York and attending the A+ Colombia University were just one of its perks. As did having a Father that covered up and payed out anyone who found out that the young Jefferson had yet to find his soulmate. Though his luck flatters when an old highschool buddy finds out and deliberately drags him out on a road trip around the country with one mission on mind.Find Jem Madison.





	1. New Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Madison hates writing essays and also makes new friends

Soulmates were a thing of the past for James Madison, he had accepted long ago - ever since his stupid _ballroom_ incident - that his own soulmate was never going to show up in his early years of life.

That, however, didn't stop him from yearning to learn and see and feel every inch of his chosen half. Were they tall or short? Skinny or plump like himself? What color were their eyes, hair? Would they even like him?

Bunching up the sleeve of his shirt he flipped his hand over to stare down at his wrist, tracing the lettering that spelled the name of his no show soulmate. He wasn't at all surprised to see that the rest of his arm lay bare of words, as they had been for years.

Staring at the exposed skin he resisted the urge to grab a pen and write in delicate cursive to his other half, wanting to spill out word after word to them. But, he remembered with a subtle sigh, he was raised to wait until he was written to first. It gave his soulmate deniability even if the fact hurt James more then he would admit.

What if they _couldn't_ write to him though? What would he do then? Waste his life regretting what could have been with his wife? Husband?

Thankfully before he continue with his drag thoughts, he had registered voices coming towards his booth hidden in the back corner of the coffeehouse. Shattering his personal world as he stared down at his half written -and admittedly half-assed- essay assignment as he strained to hear what was being said, raising a crumbled napkin to his nose as he proceeded to sneeze.

"Oui. Oui. But mon amour! I have yet to have the full American experience!"

Madison lifted his gaze at the excited tone, watching as two equally beautiful dark-skinned men sat across from him in his booth, not having noticed him yet. The first one, Madison presumed he was French, was too busy typing down something on what looked like a dearly loved laptop. His floofy hair tied tightly in a ponytail. 

"I get that Laf, but its only just a coffee shop. This one is no different then any others in the city!" The other man stated, (he was burly and looked around the same height of himself. The only difference was that he probably could snap James in half if he wanted to.) sounding amused even as his own head was nestled in what looked like a Fashion Magazine, "Can you believe this crap!" He added, stewing the magazine down onto the table with a pointed look before it turned into one of surprise at spotting James, now sheepishly smiling and hunching over to make himself appear smaller.

Looks like I've been caught, James thought averting his gave strictly to the table once more.

"Oh, shit man. We didn't see you there." The big burly one announced at the same time the Frenchman spoke, "But this is no regular shop! I heard soulmates are found here year-round!"

At the word James flinched, busying himself into organizing his already organized papers, "It's really no problem." He should probably leave now. Stop intruding on these people's life's.

What stopped him was the big man shaking his head, reaching out an arm for a hand shake. In order not to appear rude Madison had no choice but to latch onto the outstretched hand. Shaking it weakly and, perhaps out of curiosity or the sheer moment of wanting to, his eyes flickered to the man's wrist. Reading the name that lay there - Gilbert Du Motier Marquis de Lafayette - and the the messy scribbling underneath it, before slipping his hand away.

It didn't take a genius to know the two were a couple.

"Hercules Mulligan," Mulligan introduced himself, slinging an arm around his partner, "And my lover, Lafayette." The said French person smiled, lifting a hand in hello while adding, "They/Them pronouns."

Madison tried not to look surprised at that, instead returning the smile, "James Madison at your service." He offered, visibly relaxing. These two didn't look like they would pose a threat to him. He casually reached out to grab his plastic mug he had ordered, still warm in his hands as he sipped generously at the sweet coffee, asking softly, "So, what brings you two here of all places." He bites his tongue to keep in the 'Downtown isn't really a good tourist stop.' 

"We're going on a road trip with a few of our peers before college starts up again." Lafayette supplies, stealing away every bit of James attention as it seemed that the other's French accent grew thicker with each word, grin growing brighter as they tapped eagerly at the surface of the table, "I want to able to stop everywhere before we leave to the next spot." 

Out of the corner of his eye he saw rather then heard, Hercules snort playfully, quietly ordering off a menu he had found when the waitress had stopped by before turning back to the duo, "I'm trying to explain to Laf that we can't make it everywhere with such little time."

He hummed over the lid of his cup, using one hand to slip his papers into the the cheap folder he had brought with him. Glancing down at his watch and reading the time. _four-fifty P.M._ , maybe Jay would be able to help him with his essay. "There really isn't much here downtown." Madison offered lamely, standing from his side of the booth, "But I hope you find what you're looking for." He nodded and began to take his leave when a hand shot out and grabbed his arm.

"Wait," the handle slipped away but not before James caught sight of the same scribbles that had been on Hercules' arm, a sinking feeling in his gut. The flustered French person scribbled something down on a napkin with a pen James hadn't seen before, before said napkin was being pushed into his hand. "We'll be staying for awhile and in case you'd like to meet the rest of us.." Lafayette trailed off as James fixed the two of them with a shocked look.

The unheard just call us hung in the air and Madison's throat cleared as he held onto the napkin dearly, "Y-Yeah. Of course. It'll be fun if we cross paths again."

He doubted it would happen but couldn't help the way his heart swelled at their smiles.


	2. Mrs. And Mrs. Lady-Liberty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "They seemed like a nice couple."
> 
> "Meow."
> 
> —
> 
> In other words Madison has a chat with Cats.

John Jay had been Madison's friend for as long as he could remember, though they really didn't grow close until they were both filed under the undesirable (James couldn't help his awful immune system.) and what was worse- Bare-Arms. Madison could feel the involuntary shudder course through his spine at the word, quickening his pace and tugging the long sleeve of his shirt down. It was much to hot to wear in the summer heat but James would rather suffer in the heat then be met by the judging glares of the citizens of Downtown. As if it wasn't hard enough living in this slum bucket.

 _You wouldn't have to,_ James found himself thinking bitterly,  _if you weren't so undesirable to everyone around you. Your soulmate deserves someone better then you._ He begrudgingly agreed to the thought, he had given up years ago with trying to stop the nasty thoughts. The shrinks did nothing to help and he figured there was nothing wrong with feeding into a little bit of negativity every once and awhile.

His footsteps fell in step with the drum of his heart as he thought back to the happy couple but at the coffeeshop, laughing and joking in his usual dim booth. The napkin weighed heavy in the pocket he had hastily thrown it in. He couldn't wait to tell John and hear what he had to say about them. At least the town had a few perks to it.

Knitting his eyebrows together Madison passed through a familiar alleyway, stopping once or twice to admire the spray paint jobs done on the brick, raising a brow when he spotted something bold and fresh lettering; Bare-Arms are just as equal as others!, he had to urge himself not to scoff at the brave but untrue words before continuing on his way. Gripping his folder tight to his chest as he came in sight with a few rundown houses and buildings. James knew if his life were a horror film his killer would be located behind of the creaky windows or shifty doors.

Why Jay lived in this dump was still unknown to him.

Calming down a considerable amount when he climbed the steep steps of a red and white house, the door propped open by a book and loud bass music streamed through open windows.

Probably forgot to pay the a/c bill, he noted, walking right in and setting his folder on Jay's makeshift coffee table. Kicking off his shoes while wiggling his toes in his socks. On the television the news was muted (James probably wouldn't have been able to hear it over the music anyway) and glitching due to the poor signal from the antenna, he caught the wisps of it -another shooting- then turned to the kitchen where the source of music was coming from.

He wasn't quite sure what he was expecting but it wasn't this, John Jay seemed to be rid of his illness from last weak -James beamed at that, glad his friend didn't have a headache so he could proofread his work- slaving over the stove as he switched from three different pots and the oven. Shirtless, his shorts hanging low on his hips as he swayed to the music and dear God James had never realized how gay he really was. He didn't know how long he stood there but when he came to a different bass affect was drumming through his ears and Jay still hadn't noticed him.

"Jay!" Madison had to shout over the bass which would have annoyed him if he hadn't been staring shamelessly beforehand. Jay lifted his head at the shout, nearly hitting an open cabinet door before he saw the short man, giving a nod in hello James sat down in the nearest chair. Jumping as it creaked underneath him whilst Jay reluctantly turned his bass down, "What brings you over here Jemmy?" He returns back to the stove.

"My coffee booth was stolen from me J., and get this, by a college student couple -they're soulmates- who were touring!" He huffs, immediately going into an explanation, slumping in his seat and nearly falling out of it as it wobbled, Jay needed new ones. "I also need you to look at what I have now on m-" Madison was rudely cut off when the other brought a spoon of baked beans to his lips. Slowly opening them with narrowed eyes and taking the food without fuss. Watching Jay turn around and speaking up thoughtfully, "Touring in the ruins if Downtown? Who the hell gave them that idea?" It wasn't as if Downtown was special, just ruins of a great city after the war. Even before the war it was nothing like Uptown, and their were to many hate crimes to lead a peaceful life. You either fit in or you didn't, and everyone wanted to fit.

He swallowed the food down, savoring the honey taste as he shrugged, "They said they were on a road trip and gave me their number." He only got a hum in response and what Jay really thought of it all, leg shaking nervously, "Those were great by the way. Why're you cooking?"

"I have someone coming over." He responded curtly, rolling his shoulders and sparing James a glance, "They're a no-namer, Bare-Armer and Painmate."

"A what?" The words left James mouth before he could stop them, he had heard of the term no-namer (being born without the name of your soulmate was harsh, even worse knowing you'd never have one.) and he and Jay were both Bare-Arms as far as they knew. But he couldn't rack his brain for a painmate."I mean what's a painmate?" He corrected himself when Jay's stare turned cold. "A soulmate that can feel the pains of its other half." Jay shook his head, turning a few isles on the stove and adding on to his explanation, "Its a pretty sucky deal but whatever. You should get outta here before dark, dork. I'll return your paper whenever I can."

Madison resisted the urge to sulk at his friend promptly kicking him out, standing up and running his hands down his pants. He really should get home before dark though. Slipping on his shoes, calling out as he left, "Thanks Jay! I'll say hi to Lady and Liberty for you!"

"Please!"

•

To say James was exhausted was far from the truth, he had nearly forgotten how long away he lived from his best friend but at least the sun hadn't been blaring down on him like earlier either.

He emptied his pockets of his phone and the napkin, looking down at the digits with a nervous air around him before placing both objects down on the closest surface available. Heading into his bedroom while lifting his shirt up and off his body, passing by his wall mirror and narrowly avoiding looking at his chubby structure. Instead working his pants off next and bundling them together with his shirt tossing it into his dirty clothes basket on his way to the bed.

Flicking his left wrist outward once more that day he stared numbly at the name that had haunted his life. He could do it. Survive on his own, James realized, relaxing his stance as he felt a warm body rub against his leg. Switching his gaze to the black ball  curling up next him, dropping his hand into his lap as he smiled tiredly. "Hey there Lady." He scratched behind her ear, cooing loving, "J. said hello, to both you and Liberty but she's probably out napping somewhere."

Lady lifted up her head and meowed, leaning her head into his hand and blinking bright green eyes at James in a 'duh' matter. Madison chuckled laying back in the bed and getting as comfortable as he could on his mattress. Staring up at the ceiling as he relayed what had happened that day to her.

"They seemed like a nice couple."

"Meow."

"I think.. I might avoid them though."

Another meow. A rasp lick to his hand.

"I get this feeling in my gut, Lady, and I don't know if its a good or bad thing." He was afraid to take a leap. Who would catch him in the end? What if he messed up in front of them? Tripped over himself? Panicked or got suddenly sick.. or, Madison trembled, "What if they find out I'm a Bare-Arm? That my soulmate hasn't cared to write me ever?" What if they hurt him for it?

Lady rested her head on her owner's stomach, maybe in attempt for warmth or in attempt to stop the distress signals she was getting from him. Her ears twitching at the low pitched frustrated whine leaving his lips, grabbing at a bit of his chub on his stomach to refocus. Shutting his eyes as his kitten meowed again.

"You're right. I'll deal with it later." He nodded, "How 'bout I make us all dinner instead."

Madison needed the distraction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alt. Titles;  
> -Madison's a cat person  
> -Cats are better then Shrinks  
> -Lady Luck
> 
> •
> 
> Things;  
> -Jefferson is literally disgusted by cats and at some point gets a dog just to ruffle Madison's feathers. (He'd get a Boston Terrier because I quote from this website 'He must love the sound of his own bark, because he always has something important to say.' )


	3. We Keep Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Francis Fucking Madison. " John Jay laughs heartily as he slapped a twenty on the counter, "This is great! Still working as daddies little ice-cream boy I see?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for Misgendering and transphobia

Jay had, as promised, returned Madison's paper back to him as soon as he possibly could and much to his annoyance it was marked over heavily (he knew it needed work, but it still sucked to have it told to his face). He refined himself from quitting as he paged through the essay, carefully looking over the notes and questioning Jay about his night. "So, how was it?" Madison had failed to see any marks of evidence that his friend had done anything remotely close to his thoughts when he first walked in. 

"Well." Jay supplied a one word answer with a smirk and leaned back against the counter, tiring of watching over Madison as he fussed over his work, "Have you called those tourist yet? Y'know Jemmy, you need other friends than me."

Madison waved the question off before sighing and placing his work down. When would Jay realize he was completely fine on his own, with or without friends or a soulmate. His heart tugged at the thought and he scrambled to put himself together before he could fall apart in front of his friend. Coughing into his hand he turned into the kitchen, returning with a full cat bowl and shaking it a generous amount. "Speaking of friends, J., I strongly believe you owe me for taking -Here, Lady, Liberty- care of your sick -Here you go my Queens- behind for a week."

He places the bowl on the ground when the two tabbies came out of hiding, purring against his legs and he, ironically, purring back to them. Jay watched the man from the side, drinking in the way his eyelashes fluttered across his cheeks, the way his eyes lit brighter than any star in the sky and the ability he had to hold anyone above himself no matter the cost. John knew that James wasn't perfect and had his flaws and his own nasty thoughts about himself and his body. And hoped to the holy spirit or whoever was up there that James would find this Thomas Jefferson, hoped they'd be a person that would cherish every bit of Madison as he was. 

"I'll take you to your Dad's Ice-cream shop." He offered lamely. 

Madison threw him a sour look, mumbling something about discounts and nodding. 

* * *

 

If Madison was truly honest he'd fess up that he and his family hadn't gotten along since his coming out in highschool. He knew the cracks had started ever since the day in the gym, breaking the closest bond he had with his mother at first and things slowly got worst, reaching it's highest peak when he rebelled. 

However James knew he could never hate his family for their rather... closed-minded views and the transphobic slurs that were thrown at him at every turn, he had stood tall to face all the abuse and in turn had soared higher then his parents expected. It still wasn't enough to get him out of the city though. 

A sigh shuddered though his lips as he pushed open the familiar family owned ice-cream shop door, hands trembling as he remembered the hot afternoons when he and his younger siblings would sit outside on the curb to eat their free ice-creams. He didn't realize his whole self was shaking like a leaf in fall until a hand, soft with slender fingers, rested on shoulder. The grip was strong enough to ground him but gentle enough if he wanted to rip away. He could hear counting in the distance, over the sounds of cars, and evened his breath with it. 

"...ou okay?" The voice came from behind and was too gentle to be Jay's, his eyes flickered over his shoulders and he stopped short of breath at the sight of a woman, her lips were pulled down in a concerned frown, worry evident in her dark chocolate eyes while her hair, silky and black, was pulled into a messy bun. Madison concluded she would look even more beautiful if she were smiling, "Are you an angel?" He uttered, dumbfounded, had he died? 

The woman blushed red and slipped her fingers off of James, the same moment someone else spoke, "Stop reciting poetry in your head James. "

He whisked his head around to glare at Jay, who, despite his cocky grin, looked worried. Huffing Madison fixed his shirt and opens the door for the lady, "I'm fine ma'am, thank you. Just anxiety catching up with me." He smiled, "James Madison."

She smiled and James wooed beside her, "Elizabeth Schuyler." She greeted, thanking him briefly for the door then briskly walking out of the shop and disappearing into the streets. Jay whistled, shaking his head while muttering to no-one but himself, "Ain't that something, ain't that something." Madison ignored him in favor of stepping up to the display stands, pondering quietly about the girl. Her last name had him on edge, where had he heard it before? 

He was snapped out of thought when a calloused hand clapped his back, causing him to double back in pain. "We'll if it ain't my favourite Bare-Arm, what are you doing here my dear little sister." 

Bile rose in James' throat as he was forced to crane his head up to glare into the younger Madison's eyes. "Francis," James acknowledged bitterly, crossing his arms over his chest, "I see even now, you don't know your place -he sneaks a glance behind the counter- but since you're here, my friend and I would like two chocolate cones."

Francis glowered and James, if he were in another situation, would have cowered down if not for the fact that they both were in a public place. The worse thing Francis could do here was misgender him. "Sure ma'am." his brother curtly nodded, looked around to spot John Jay flirting with a girl and sneered, "Two chocolate cones for two Bare-Armers."

James only rolled as Francis stomped away like child. Reaching up and tugging a hand through his hair,  _you are valid,_ he pressed his lips together tightly,  _You are a valid human being James Madison,_ he'd reprimand himself, tapping his foot nervously on the floor. He snorted when Jay was pushed away by the girl and sulked towards him. "No luck?" Madison asked as his friend recovered his soul mark with a wristband, "Nope. Ice-cream? I thought I heard the most insufferable voice but I wasn't sure."

Shrugging he let Jay see for himself when the waiting bell rang and his brother was waiting with their ice-cream, "Francis Fucking Madison!" John Jay laughs heartily as he slapped a twenty on the counter, "This is great! Still working as daddies little ice-cream boy I see- can you believe this James! Holy shit."

James took that as queue to grab the cones, Francis was left seething as they took their leave (Jay laughing the whole way out.), they walked in comfortable silence before - "That was mean."

"He deserved it James." His friends tone signals finality and James doesn't bring it up again. They walk on joking and finishing their cones with little to no mess when Madison notices a familiar halo of hair at a stop sign with the woman that had helped him earlier. _Of course they would know each other_ , he thinks with a shake of his head, starting to make a b-line when; "James! James Madison!"

Now he knows he could continue walking and ignore Lafayette's calls but the sinking feeling in his gut returns (that and he knows Jay would never let him live it down.), he stops dead in his tracks. "Lafayette, a pleasure to see you again! This is my friend, John Jay." He directs the attention to Jay for a moment to gather himself, who introduces himself to them both. 

"You two know each other?" She, no, Eliza cuts to the chase, looking between him and them. They both nod. 

"Yes!"

"We keep meeting."

Lafayette smiles warmly and James can't help but return it, "The rest of our friends are just in that building over there." They point to the motel across the street and Madison shifts on his feet knowing where this is going, "If you are free would you care to join us? Non? "

The short male has a response ready, "I have so-"

He is cut off by his bestfriend, "We would love to join," he ruffles Madison's hair, "this one needs more friends. " the French person does not hesitate to take that answer as a yes, "Oui! You will love them! Honors Scout!" They clap their hands together, eager for the spotlight to singal the groups go. 

"Scout's Honor." Elizabeth corrects softly even as Lafayette doesn't seem to hear her. 

Maybe, Madison looks down at his rat-tag tennis shoes, their friends would be just as calm and kind as Elizabeth. 

Wishful thinking he guesses. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things;  
> -Madison is a TA sometimes but still struggles to keep up with class most of the time  
> -John Jay flirts with everyone!!  
> -Madison hasn't gotten along with his family since he came out
> 
> —
> 
> Yo if I wrote anything wrong about James' anxiety attack please correct me!!


	4. Sometimes love is the biggest lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What's their name?" He asks curiously, the tele is turned up to a soft murmur and Thomas dryly remarks, "Goodnight James."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw; another panic attack

The moment Madison walks into the motel he is put in awe, this wasn't what he expected, far from it. The front room (the  _front_ room, James marveled at the word)  looked the size of his bedroom, kitchen, and half of his living room combined, one exit lead to the kitchen and another to the living room. 

It doesn't look anything like the motels he and his family used during their trips and suddenly he feels like a speck of dirt in this grand place. He feels smaller then usual and lingers close to his friend as they are brought into the living room (James notices a hallway and counts at least eight,   _eight,_ different doors.). 

He wonders how clear it is that he doesn't belong. 

"This is the fanciest motel I've ever seen. It's nerve-wracking." Jay leans down to whisper to Madison as Lafayette calls in their friends. Madison agrees, toeing the red carpet that layed nicely on the stone floor to ground himself, he could never afford any of this a day in his life. 

The first two that enter the room look as if they've both woken, he recognizes one of them as Hercules almost immediately catching his gaze and smiling, the tension in his shoulders easing away. The other not quite, Madison quickly realizes the stains on his clothes are paint and the dots littering his his face and arms aren't stars but freckles. They amaze him and he silently wishes his name is the same on his wrist. 

Next two women tumble gracefully after the boys and join Eliza's side. Each of them hugging each other. A sharp questioning look settling in the tallers face as she places a hand in her hip, making James lower his gaze to the girl in the yellow skirt, a friendlier but still questioning look in her eyes at the sight of Jay and himself. Feeling his hands clam up and tremble he placed them into his pockets away from view. 

And if he truly felt like a peasant under the women's eyes, he couldn't explain how he felt when the last member walked out. Tall with confidence in his steps, dark and handsome, jeans clung nicely to his legs and his white cut-off sweater hung fittingly to his body. His hair seemed like a literal gift from the gods, crowning his face pleasantly. 

Madison sucked in a tiny breath, throat suddenly dry as the man looked him over with a bored and disinterested look in his eye. 

He was the first to break the silence and James felt blessed by his voice, "Who let the downtown trash in." Before it came hailing back down on him and James decided he disliked the man right then and there. He opened his mouth to retort but like always Jay beat him by a mile, playing the field and giving the upstaters as little as information possible. "Jay at your service," he winked at one of the girls, "And this is my Jemmy." John placed an arm around Madison's shoulders. 

"James." He corrected, missing the flash of disappointment on everyone's face, "And I belong to no-one." Madison strained out, softly nudging out of his friends hold. There's a bit of an awkward silence, He's heard stories of how they do things uptown and just wanted to clarify that he was no-ones pet. That he was his own person, "I strongly believe in the rights that everyone is equal."

That earned a feisty from the look-alike Lafayette and a well raised eyebrow from the tallest woman, "Angelica Schuyler." She reached forward to shake Madison's hand, her grip tight, "I strongly share your views."

He beamed and quickly added, "Well I fair we'll get along just well." Angelica smiled softly, drawing away and patting the woman's head next to her. Who swats it away with a smile, curls bouncing around her face as she waves at Madison and Jay respectively, "I'm Peggy! The youngest and by far greater of the group! We assume you've met Eliza already?"

"Twice," Jay happily answers, they both bowed their heads in greeting to the three sisters. "The first time James nearly melted in front of her. The charm of an upstater really is as great as they say." Jay laughs, Madison rolls his eyes as both Herc and the boy next to him joins in. 

He ignored the heat traveling to his face as freckles spoke up, "We could say the same about the two of you," he smiles and it's crooked- full with joy, "I'm John Laurens but y'all can call me whatever y'all like." Madison perks up at the slip of the southern drawl,  bouncing his knee in excitement. He hadn't known there were any southerners living in Uptown at all, it was nice. 

James tilts his head to the last member who has to introduce themselves, watching as he slid into the couch, crossing one leg over the other as he spoke, "Thomas." He drawled. Madison felt his heart leap into his throat and he stood tall, questions burning on the tip of his tongue before- "Laf why is there a charity case in our living room?" Thomas asked tiredly. 

"Charity case?" Madison grits out, narrowing his eyes, "Oh, pardon me. How dare I forget that while  _you_ sit on your ass all day most of us Charity Cases are working four jobs a day to pay bills-" half the room looks away in shame not including Thomas. Setting James off again, "What your goal down here anyway? Don't you have some high socialite wife waiting back at home for you."

That seemed to hit the spot and Thomas leans forwards to retort- he was off cut by Lafayette. No matter, James was satisfied. "Actually," Lafayette stepped up as if to cease the tension, standing beside Hercules and placing a hand on his arm, "The real reason we're traveling is to find Thomas' soulmate."

A look of shock flickered through Madison eyes and now he feels like a jerk, mouth drying for a different reason all together. Shifting on his feet nervously. Bare-Arms? In Uptown? This must be a joke. 

_Or..._

Quickly smothering his thoughts that,  _No, this man from upstate named Thomas is NOT your soulmate!_

Hercules must have taken his discomfort and body language as disgust because not a moment later is the burly man taking a threatening step forward, posture familiar in ways James doesn't remember and it sends him down a spiraling void of static. This guy really  _could_ snap him in half. 

He barely felt the hand that Jay put on his shoulder to nudge him behind himself, distantly hearing Hercules speak, "Yo, if that's a problem we're going to have to ask you to leave."

He did hear the voice in the back of his head speak loudly,  _You're a problem for us, just leave._

Madison knew he was slipping through the cracks even as Jay squeezed his shoulder to keep him grounded. He felt numb. 

"That would be crazy of us, seeing as we're fellow Bare-Arms. Madison's just.. didn't... no idea ther... in-"

He wavered in and out of the present and past. Shutting his eyes just to rest them. The world was tilting, he was reliving the past; guarded footsteps, angry yelling, whispering; low and soothing as he was rocked in his mother's arms. She always apologized after hitting him, cursing that she had to build him up. It wasn't his fault, she'd whisper, it was his no show soulmates. 

He knew then her love was the biggest lie. 

* * *

When he came to he'd suck in a deep breath as if finally being able to breathe after submerging from deep water. He was sat on the floor with a blanket on his shoulders, one of his sleeves bunched up (thankfully, he sighed, not the one with the name) and was face was wet. From tears he presumed. Not only that but he was so tired, two attacks in one day taking a large drain on his body. 

Madison seeked the warmth of his bed and the comfort of his two lovely tabbies but first he had to find the strength to get up and leave. 

 _Or you could just rot and die,_ the thought ran through bitterly and immediately annoyed James because a small part of himself agreed. 

"Shut up." His voice was hoarse and his throat itched, he tired to fight the cough rising but only ended up doubling over in a fit of them, paying no mind to the sudden hand rubbing his back awkwardly until it passed. He turned around to thank them when a glass of what looked like water was nudged into his hand so he could drink, gladly accepting it. 

"Y'know," Madison paused from his drinking as he recognized the southern drawl, shoulders dropping as he realized it wasn't Jay's bland one or the barely there ones of Laurens. He was in a halflit room with Thomas. Alone. 

"You really shouldn't try to start a fight after passing out." Thomas took the glass the back when Madison shoved it his way, the creaking of a bed echoing in the room and a clacking nose as the glass was set down. 

James was bitterly aware he was in the room that belonged to the very man that taunted him and fumed at the reminder that he had definitely blacked out in front of him. Thomas probably thought that he  _was_ weak downtown trash and didn't want that, he didn't respond. Plucking at the carpet strands that lit up in the dim glow of the flickering television (a really nice one. James had never seen one so skinny) he hadn't noticed before. "Where's J.?"

Thomas sighed, shifted on the bed, then answered, "Your friend brought you in here in here after Laurens and I made sure you didn't die or something. He's asleep on the couch." There was a pregnant pause, more shuffling, "Do you want me to turn on the light?"

Madison shook his head, then realizing the other couldn't see that, vocalized himself, "No, thank you." (It still hurt to talk, he wondered in dread if he had been yelling.) He didn't want to see how grand Thomas' room actually was- didn't even want to be in it. He hugged the blankets closer to himself, his poor Queens were probably worried about him and hungry. "What time is it?" Madison realizes that he left his crap flipphone at home when they went for ice-cream. 

For a moment a bright light fills the room and Thomas reads; "12:32 am." before the light goes off. James' stomach flips, he can't walk home this late unless he wants a death wish. 

"I graduated top of my class in highschool." He aims to impress but all he gets in return is a sarcastic drawl, "Really?"

He deflates and feels bad for anyone who gets stuck ad Thomas' soulmate. "What's their name?" He asks curiously, the tele is turned up to a soft murmur and Thomas dry remarks, "Goodnight James."

Madison slumps and now he really misses Lady and Liberty. Things could be worse though. 

"Goodnight."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things;  
> \- Tommy boy is shameless and bi and a jerk  
> \- who has experience with Panic attacks  
> -James considered changing his last name but kept it to piss his family off  
> -James had really abusive Parents, he wasn't the only hit but tried to protect the little ones  
> -Thomas is real sensitive over talks that include his soulmate  
> -That owning thing James mentions, he's talking about servants; slavery was declared illegal after The War.

**Author's Note:**

> -Madison is trans (with complete surgery) and has gone by James since highschool
> 
> -Looking for Beta atm


End file.
